Touchdown Bangor!

I kissed the tarmac at Manchester Airport or as close to the tarmac as I could get. It was actually the floor of the arrivals lounge and it tasted of strong disinfectant that made my lips sting. I’m glad that I experienced America. It has taught me of a world that’s harsher and odder than the one I’ve known in North Wales. People are no stranger over there but with so many gathered together in one place, there’s much more chance that a group of the very oddest should gather together and take part in orgies for the sagging and hairless. My buttocks are still sore where I lost skin jumping through that window but I’m really just aching from all the travelling and in need of good hot bath.

When I got home, Gabby was really quite angry with me. She’s been reading this blog and knew everything about my ‘adventures’. I think she was most angry about my desperate need to make easy money and she’s made me donate the $5000 to a good cause. It’s probably for the best and the local donkey sanctuary promised to put the money to good use. No doubt they’ll name a feed bucket in my honour.