The Daddy

I've only just got back from London so excuse this rather late and lazy post, lacking my usual verbal dexterity or, more accurately, haphazard way with words. The tiredness puts a cramp on my style and the exhilaration has put a knot in my thong.

As you're now probably aware, I won my Blog Power category. But before you go saying anything, I know I shouldn't have said 'won'. I should have used a more inclusive term that would make the other nominees feel equally worthwhile. Only, I'm such an articulate wordsmith that I just hate to misuse words. We all know that I said 'won' when I actually meant 'trounced the opposition'.

I actually heard the good news when I hit a wireless hotspot at the Great Bridgeford Service Station on the M6 at eight o'clock tonight. As you can see, I just had to capture the moment for posterity and the British Thong Society newsletter. It's the spontaneous things like this that make victory taste even sweeter, though I admit I got a few funny looks as I stripped down to my thong in the car park. The traffic cops who turned up minutes later were a bit of trouble until I mentioned that Bryan Appleyard had also won an award. Of course, my 119 votes had clearly helped him across the finish line, but to the police, the name meant corrupt voting patterns, menace at the ballot box, and the severed heads of cats left beneath the electorate's duvets. Barely had the name passed my lips before they visibly paled and stood back to let Gabby take the picture.

Speaking of Gabby, at the last minute, my sweet Romanian had appeared with the lettering you can see in the photo. She'd cut it from from the Disability Week appeal banner in the mini mart. I suppose we should have added a few lines of thanks to James for dropping out the competition at the last moment but there was no letter 'J' in 'guidedogs'. And to be perfectly honest, the police wanted to calm things down once the crowd began to gather and we were also losing the light. James of course deserves my thanks for making my victory possible. A complimentary Chipster posing pouch will be on its way to him with the morning post and I expect to see pictures of him wearing it on his blog within the month. Don't be shy, James. Just consider it another of your very many services to blogging for which you've been so rightly rewarded...

So, thanks for all who did the only rational thing and voted for me. You've made the world a better place and you should all consider yourself thongettes for life.

I now must go and plan what I'll wear for the virtual awards ceremony at Second Life. If they don't do thongs, I won't be going. But I'm sure they do, so I will. See you all there.