Breathe Right

I bought Gabby some of those Breathe Right Nasal Strips yesterday after seeing the ad on TV. I thought it might help improve the asthma she’s been suffering since she has started to spend more time hanging around with her chickens. I don’t know what they did for my little Romanian wheezer, but I had a terrible night’s sleep. I dreamt I was a double jointed and kept kicking myself between the legs. At some point my imagined pain became too much and I woke up. That’s when I discovered that Gabby had pulled off the strip during the night and it had somehow managed to bind my genitals to my right thigh. I can’t begin to describe the pain involved in pulling it off. Nor can I say my breathing improved. If anything, it made me gasp just a bit.