Monday, October 29, 2007


‘I claim this blog on behalf of the people of the Republic of Romania.’

Gabby told by embassy people to type that. Now it mine and protected by laws of Romania and European Union. If Chip think he coming to post on here again he have Italian army on his ass.

Do you know what he tried to do tonight? He climbed ladder up to window. I leave window open on account of fire. It only little fire. Not worth mention. Then it caught curtain when chicken fly around room. Gabby put all fire out but room smells bad of burning feathers. Then Chippy tries to get in window. I tell him he’s sneaky and I hit his fingers with bucket. He goes like he hurt. I didn’t believe him. He always acting like he’s hurt. Even when he fell off ladder I knew there nothing wrong with him. I close window.

He now ring me to say he got to sleep in YCMA. I don’t know what YCMA is and I don’t care. Why he can’t sleep in park like Gabby and sister do when we first came here I do not know.

You might say Gabby being hard on Chip but what is beautiful sexy lady to do? I already have people saying how much they like me. Mrs. Baroque say she write me poem. Background Artist says he billionaire and he wants me and will hire hitman to sort out Chippy. But Gabby will say no. Gabby do own contracts than you very much.

I don’t know what to do with Chip. He such a handsome man and Gabby felt sorry for him when I watch him go limping into night. I hope YCMA are nice to man wearing only thong and cowboy boots. I hope they tuck him in and kiss him goodnight. Now Gabby feel lonely. Especial when Gabby’s sister very excited by man in orange but he play hard to get like Rambo in Rambo 3. But if he keep being cold sausage I ask Brucie Forsyth if he want to meet Gabby’s sister. And if Brucie say no, then I ask Elberry who likes tanks and keeps knifes in his bedroom.

Now Gabby crying and people at embassy say I must not cry. They say this is now biggest blog in Romania but Gabby troubled. I never wanted to be biggest blogger in Romania. They say I have to post story tomorrow about yeast harvest. I don’t care about yeast harvest.

I hope Chip having good sleep at YCMA. I hope he making new friends. I miss him like time I lost stone for sharpening knifes.


Ian Appleby said...

Rambo? Rambo? He's a big softy. I've made it out of Vietnam armed only with a toothpick - some of the shellfish can be very fibrous - and brought all my party with me. As I said to you at the Senator's place, please convey to your sister the fact I have a variety of orange shirts, if she would care to see them. Plus, unlike some I could mention, I didn't have to buy in all my hair and teeth.

What rank is Monica, incidentally?

elberry said...

Chip'll be fine. Man like him, first night there he'll be befriended by a hulking tattooed brute of a man, called Steve. Steve will say, "I could be a friend to you." Chip will nod mutely.

Big Chip Dale said...

Ian, I see you never got an answer. Gabby is so lazy. Monica is a Captain of a light mechanized infantry unit. And has seen action in every one of the world's hot spots.

Elberry, thank you for your support. You might be disappointed to learn that I had an enjoyable evening with the chaps at the club, playing bridge and drinking port.