Friday, April 20, 2007

A New Vista

I’m not a geek. I haven’t got the time. I haven’t got the halitosis. And there’s simply not enough room in my life for computers, Romanian girlfriends, and my ongoing quest to find the perfect thong. But I do like a good writing environment. I have a Mac sitting in my office for that very reason. I want easy to use machines that don’t answer back. I like sleek lines too. I want to oil up my machine late at night as though it’s an extension of Chipster central.

However, when it came to buying a laptop recently, I had to go for the PC. You don’t know how many times I’d have to fill my pouch with fivers before I could afford to buy a PowerBook. And Apple just won't extend their discounts to strippers, even though we're technically educating people as much as a teachers. That’s why I bought myself a Sony Vaio. A geek wouldn’t buy a Vaio. They’re probably more style than substance. But I don’t care. What I want in a machine is not what others want.

Which is why last night I installed my nice new shiny copy of Windows Vista and it doesn't matter to me about all the bad press it’s been getting. I simply love it like no man should love an operating system.

There will be some who say I’m a twisted deviant who also likes to steal the ice cream from children or push old people under tractors. But the truth is that I love my new Vista. I love it for one reason and one reason alone. My laptop goes from standby to work mode in seconds. In fact, it’s probably less than that. I open the lid and my desktop is ready for me. It’s as quick as that.
I don’t care about games, graphics, desktop publishing, or any of that rubbish. From standby to wordprocessor in milliseconds. I can’t ask for better. It allows me to pick up my laptop and jot down my latest though before I’ve had chance to forget it. If Microsoft could now only turn their attention to designing the perfect thong, I’d be a very happy man.

9 comments:

Smith said...

Sound like a very good choice. I can't decide whether to stay with my PC or save up for a Mac.

Chip Dale said...

If you want computer advice from a stripper: a Mac is a superior machine. It has the superior operating system. However, if you want to live in the real world and want a variety of easy to find software to run on it, you can't beat the PC. However, the new Macs, using the Intel chips, are effectively PCs, therefore they can run (with a bit of Apple software) PC software. Not sure, however, if they'd run really heavy duty software...

If I was rich, I'd have both a modern PC and a modern Mac. If I had to choose, I'd go with a really powerful PC. PCs can be built up into something very powerful and are easier to upgrade. You can chop and change the hardware, if you know what you're doing.

At the moment, I'm suffering from the slight problems that come with PCs and enjoying a wide range of software.

Did I mention that I'm not a geek? ;o)

Cue the Macaholics out for my lightly oiled skin...

Anonymous said...

Bought my wife a laptop from Tesco's ,easier to take back when it fails (it will) it has Vista on it ,me I think Vista is rubbish ,I will wait for a few years before I upgrade or at least wait until sp1 or sp2 is out,I will stick with my trusty pc, motherboard bought in Queensferry,case bought in Chester other bits bought in Landudno (scouse spelling),a mac is great for graphics ,but you pay a load of money for the software.

Chip Dale said...

The key to Vista is the term 'duel boot'. If it becomes unstable, I've got 'trusty' XP to fall back on. At the moment, I'm just loving all the swishy sounds and transparent windows.

I'll probably hate it by next week... Did mention that boots from standby in literally one second?

Ms Baroque said...

I dunno. I love my little iBook. And my iMac, but no one else will care because it's just a G4.

Chippy, I think the Vaio is a decent choice on style grounds, except I can imagine Bryan Ferry using one.

Ms Baroque said...

Sorry - that was a bit low. Anyway, I'm sure he has the PowerBook. Hope that's better...

Chip Dale said...

With his Teutonic leanings, Bryan Ferry is bound to have a PowerBook... Or rather, that's a POWERBook. Emphasis on the power.

There's nothing wrong with a G4. My old Mac's a G4.

I should add that my laptop is a *cheap* Vaio. I really wanted one of those more expensive models with carbon fibre covers. Alas, I made do with plastic. Until, that is, Microsoft see sense in this country and present the nation's bloggers with new laptops to celebrate Vista's launch like they did in America... Perhaps I should sell them advertising space on my thong.

Delicolor said...

Duel boot, chip?

Do they fight each other?

Mind you, at times, both OS's behave like one-legged men at arse kicking party.

Chip Dale said...

'Duel boot'!!! I can't believe I typed that! But that's the pleasure with the web. Every little mistake I make lives on... It's a bit like the time when my thong snapped and it... Well, perhaps another time.

'Duel boot' does perhaps make make sense, though. I really can't decide which OS I like the best. XP is so familiar and Vista so odd. I think it's going to take me a while to get familiar with it.