Monday, April 23, 2007

The Curious Itch

I had a curious itch around my loins this morning. One’s mind naturally suspects flea infestations but a quick inspection told me it was something much less severe. It was merely my English genes waving their flags and draping bunting around my hips.

It’s St. George’s Day! God Save The Queen! Now let’s say bad things about the French.

It probably also explains the ill-tempered rant I posted earlier and for which I sincerely apologise. I get hot under my shirtless collar with dickie-bow attachment whenever I become extraordinarily jealous. And a place on Dame Edna’s soft has always been one of my deepest held wishes, along with flashing any member of the Geldof houshold. Actually, I once caught a fleeting glance of Sir Bob on one of my visits to London, but I couldn’t get my trousers off quickly enough. However, now I’ve grown older, I’ve mellowed somewhat. I’d be quite happy to flash any of them: Trixie Geldof, Bumblebee Geldof, Dumbledore Geldof, or even John Dos Passos Geldof.

The point is: you must never abandon your dreams, no matter how crazy they sound.

13 comments:

Anonymous said...

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/england/manchester/6584479.stm

Go on, you know you want to..

Chip Dale said...

Anonymous, I was wondering what you were talking about (and not a little disturbed) until I reached the end of that article.

What can I say? With age comes great wisdom...

Ms Baroque said...

"I once caught a fleeting glance of Sir Bob on one of my visits to London, but I couldn’t get my trousers off quickly enough."

That's funny - the same thing happened to me a few months ago!

Chip Dale said...

And I'm sure, Ms. Baroque, that our intentions were very different...

Anonymous said...

Of course, she may have been talking about furniture, as she appears to be something of an antique - but it does make me feel rather better about my diet.

I am now off down the chippy for fish, chips and mushy peas, and I ain't kiddin'.

Keep up the good work..

Anonymous said...

Ms Baroque - you appear to have left out the words 'raunchy sex' preceding 'siren' from your 'profile', just so you are aware...

Chip Dale said...

Anonymous, I think I'm missing those words too...

mutterings and meanderings said...

Chippie, I am confused. I thought you were Welsh. I thought the Welsh hated the English? Explain yourself!

Ms Baroque said...

Chippy, I' not so sure there - on homage is an homage no matter how it's expressed.

Anonymous, you'll just have to imagine they're there. Ah! I see you did!

Ms Baroque said...

AN homage, of course I meant...

Chip Dale said...

M&M: I think I've mentioned (in very small print) that I have English parents. I also have many English relatives, including one Farmer who is currently AWOL somewhere in the Welsh social services system.

Ms. Baroque: a homage? Really? I didn't know you were such a fan. I'll have to send you an authentic Chip Dale thong so you look the part.

Anonymous said...

oldie but goodie..

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/england/norfolk/5275506.stm

rilly super said...

M&M, chip has reconciled his multi-ethnic identity now I believe, although his divided loyalties when younger were most starkly illustrated when he joined Meibion Glyndwr and burned down his cottage.