Eurovison Fallout

Over for another year, Eurovision fades in my memory but weighs heavily on my digestion. I’m now ready to turn my attention to the last day of the English Premiership and the battle between West Ham, Sheffield United, and Wigan.

Gabby is in a bad mood today. She believes there was a conspiracy to keep the Romanians from winning Eurovision but I tell her that the conspiracy was much darker than that. Next year the Eurovision will come from Serbia and I think it will stay in the Balkans for decades to come. Politicians must take note. Didn’t World War I start in the Balkans because of this kind of scullduggery?

The only way we can match it is if we break up the Union. Scotland, Northern Ireland, England and Wales could exchange votes and we’d each be certain of 30 point lead on our rivals. If we could get the Isle of Man and the Channel Islands involved too, we might have the Eurovison stitched up for the next hundred years.

The question is: are there any politicians out there brave enough to take this vital step?

Wigan are now leading Sheffield, and Tevez has scored for West Ham. This should be an exciting 45 minutes, so long as there’s no fixed results. I’ve had enough of those for one weekend.